Hi Friends & Family!
I hope this note finds all of you well, and happy? Hopefully each of you have had a bit of time to reflect on the season and what it means to each of you. I wish good things and good health for you in 2008.
December has been the best month! I say this because the paper, the lights, the mangers, the food, the get-to-gethers, the hugs and the laughter have been the best ever! As crummy as things have been (due to my cancer news/events) I can't be down this time of year. If cancer has taught me anything, its taught me to appreciate-- everything.
I've learned to appreciate cloudy days, to many phone calls, traffic lights, and vacuuming. These are some of the things that used to drive me crazy! Now.... let's just say that "these are the kinds of problems I want to have". Sorry to be so vague, but nobody has the time to read about what used to drive me into a spastic state. I guess I'm trying to say, that (i think anyway!) I worry about the little things, less.
I have to admit, that Steve has been instrumental in my happiness these days. My wonderful husband gives me more hugs, looks of concern, love & pep talks than I can tolerate! He is very supportive, & loving, and I feel blessed to have him in my life. He's also doing a great job of taking care of me. Not only when I'm sick from chemo & the Neulasta, but when I'm down & blue. Steve is cheerful, positive and brightens my moods. (as you can imagine, thats not an easy job!!) Lets just call him my "Sunshine".
I can see that I"m getting long winded now. Lets blame this, and not making any real point, on chemo brain. I just wanted to say that December has been a great month!
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Saturday, December 22, 2007
A week after Chemo #5
What to say: More of the same. Round five, came & went, along with the shot that keeps my white count up & fighting. The shot is what makes me feel so bad; I truely hate getting it. However, a week later, I'm feeling better: up and around, even out and about. Steve has been making sure that I rest (when I don't want to) and going about my day easily (even though I don't think I need to!)
I'm really enjoying having my family together for the holiday. The beautiful paper, and Christmas decorations have really brightened my spirits! I find myself just sitting & taking it all in; probably appreciating the meaning of the season "really" for the first time. I'm feeling blessed and fortunate.
January 4, 2008 around 2pm Eastern Time, please take a second to acknowledge my completion of chemotherapy treatment number 6. On the Oncology Infusion Unit, there is a brass Navy bell to ring when one finishes chemo. I've been dreaming about ringing that bell, and what it signifies for months now. Finishing chemo is huge, like completing a marthon; I"m ready to win & finish this race.
I probably wont write again before Christmas, so everybody, have a Merry one. Please remember the true meaning for this season.
I'm really enjoying having my family together for the holiday. The beautiful paper, and Christmas decorations have really brightened my spirits! I find myself just sitting & taking it all in; probably appreciating the meaning of the season "really" for the first time. I'm feeling blessed and fortunate.
January 4, 2008 around 2pm Eastern Time, please take a second to acknowledge my completion of chemotherapy treatment number 6. On the Oncology Infusion Unit, there is a brass Navy bell to ring when one finishes chemo. I've been dreaming about ringing that bell, and what it signifies for months now. Finishing chemo is huge, like completing a marthon; I"m ready to win & finish this race.
I probably wont write again before Christmas, so everybody, have a Merry one. Please remember the true meaning for this season.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Monday, December17, 2007
Dear Family, Friends & Supporters,
I"m writing to let you know that round number five went well. I am very anxious to start number six, so that I can be done with all this chemotherapy business. With each round, I get more and more tired, and even weaker than before. I hate being tired and weak, with not even an excuse of being hung-over to go along with my complaints!
Like four other times before, my symptoms stem from the Neulasta shot I get. This shot keeps my lab values high, ableing my White Cells to fight what they need to. However, this drug alone kicks my butt. However, the alternative isn't an option; especially since I only have one more treatment to go! 8-) yeaeeee Currently, I"m suffering from muscle and joint pain, with a dash of heart palpitations on the side. I've had these same symptoms all along, so at least I know what to expect. They all stink, but tolerable.
January four, around 2pm Eastern time, I hope everybody will take a moment to tell cancer..... Ha Ha from Tiffany Capps!
I"m writing to let you know that round number five went well. I am very anxious to start number six, so that I can be done with all this chemotherapy business. With each round, I get more and more tired, and even weaker than before. I hate being tired and weak, with not even an excuse of being hung-over to go along with my complaints!
Like four other times before, my symptoms stem from the Neulasta shot I get. This shot keeps my lab values high, ableing my White Cells to fight what they need to. However, this drug alone kicks my butt. However, the alternative isn't an option; especially since I only have one more treatment to go! 8-) yeaeeee Currently, I"m suffering from muscle and joint pain, with a dash of heart palpitations on the side. I've had these same symptoms all along, so at least I know what to expect. They all stink, but tolerable.
January four, around 2pm Eastern time, I hope everybody will take a moment to tell cancer..... Ha Ha from Tiffany Capps!
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Happy Thursday!
Hi all-
I'm writing just to say "HI". It has been a while since I wrote, and I didn't want people to think I was neglecting my website. As of right now, I have nothing new to report. I'm doing okay, trying to make the best out of each day.
I recently went to Steve's Christmas party, and had great fun! It was nice to see familiar, friendly faces, as well as laugh. My boy is home for the holiday, and I think that is pretty wonderful; I have more family arriving soon, and I'm pretty excited about that also. I'm enjoying all the holiday lights, pretty Christmas paper, and delicious baked goods.
Again, I'm feeling okay. I"m getting ready to receive chemo treatment number 5 tomorrow. I've learned that I need to just go with the flow, and not fight my symptoms. Now, when I get tired, I rest. If I'm not hungry, I don't eat (however, I"m not missing many meals!); going with the flow seems to get me on the other side faster. Does that make sense?
Anyway, "HI" all. I hope each of you are doing well, I am....Tiffany
I'm writing just to say "HI". It has been a while since I wrote, and I didn't want people to think I was neglecting my website. As of right now, I have nothing new to report. I'm doing okay, trying to make the best out of each day.
I recently went to Steve's Christmas party, and had great fun! It was nice to see familiar, friendly faces, as well as laugh. My boy is home for the holiday, and I think that is pretty wonderful; I have more family arriving soon, and I'm pretty excited about that also. I'm enjoying all the holiday lights, pretty Christmas paper, and delicious baked goods.
Again, I'm feeling okay. I"m getting ready to receive chemo treatment number 5 tomorrow. I've learned that I need to just go with the flow, and not fight my symptoms. Now, when I get tired, I rest. If I'm not hungry, I don't eat (however, I"m not missing many meals!); going with the flow seems to get me on the other side faster. Does that make sense?
Anyway, "HI" all. I hope each of you are doing well, I am....Tiffany
Saturday, December 1, 2007
More of the same
Hi All-
Monday's Duke appointment was more of the same, junkie news. In short, Duke doc confirmed the diagnosis of stage four breast cancer of the lungs. Since the drugs I'm currently on are working, she recommends I continue this regiment. Since we weren't going to radiate the lungs, she recommends no radiation to the chest, clavical, & axilla areas. Orignially, I wasn't excited about "having" to have radiation. Hearing what this Duke doc had to say about radiation only confirmed that for my quality of life, I'm not radiating anything in my body. Duke doc was happy that my cancer was responding to the current treatments, and doesn't want to change anything.
I'll finish chemotherapy around January 4th. After that, I'll have scan's every 6-8weeks to see what is or isn't metabolically active. A plan only goes in motion after there is a re-occurence. Duke doc gave me a short time line to "live", however she did say that there are many trials out there that maybe the cure. "Be here for when the cure is found", is what she said. Now, people (mom) don't get mad about the time-line, I asked. I was curious, so she gave me a best guess, along with the be here when there's a cure speech. I shoulda asked....... Anyway, people don' t get upset or hurt or blow off what I was told, I was interested & thought ya'll should know too. (notice I wont give out exact time ''cause I'm gonna be that 1 in 4 who wins the fight)
If anything, my experience should teach others to not to wait "until maybe the next deployment is over", or "maybe in another paycheck or two" to live. Time gets short somehow? I really hope that they're are others out there who know me, know my experience and share it with others. 1)Get your boobs checked. If you have fibrocystic tissue anyway, have a history and are "to young" to have a mammogram, force the issue. 2) Buy, yes give up those few extra dollars for somekind of disability from your jobs. You'll never know when you have to be outta work. I never invested in anything, and that was/is a bad choice. Thank goodness friends on two coasts fundraised for me, but there is nothing like a pay check and over-time! These are a couple of lesson's I hope others learn from my experience.
Until next time, I"m okay. Steve is taking care of me this week; I have a head cold on top of just having chemo on the 27th. Again, I"m okay.
Monday's Duke appointment was more of the same, junkie news. In short, Duke doc confirmed the diagnosis of stage four breast cancer of the lungs. Since the drugs I'm currently on are working, she recommends I continue this regiment. Since we weren't going to radiate the lungs, she recommends no radiation to the chest, clavical, & axilla areas. Orignially, I wasn't excited about "having" to have radiation. Hearing what this Duke doc had to say about radiation only confirmed that for my quality of life, I'm not radiating anything in my body. Duke doc was happy that my cancer was responding to the current treatments, and doesn't want to change anything.
I'll finish chemotherapy around January 4th. After that, I'll have scan's every 6-8weeks to see what is or isn't metabolically active. A plan only goes in motion after there is a re-occurence. Duke doc gave me a short time line to "live", however she did say that there are many trials out there that maybe the cure. "Be here for when the cure is found", is what she said. Now, people (mom) don't get mad about the time-line, I asked. I was curious, so she gave me a best guess, along with the be here when there's a cure speech. I shoulda asked....... Anyway, people don' t get upset or hurt or blow off what I was told, I was interested & thought ya'll should know too. (notice I wont give out exact time ''cause I'm gonna be that 1 in 4 who wins the fight)
If anything, my experience should teach others to not to wait "until maybe the next deployment is over", or "maybe in another paycheck or two" to live. Time gets short somehow? I really hope that they're are others out there who know me, know my experience and share it with others. 1)Get your boobs checked. If you have fibrocystic tissue anyway, have a history and are "to young" to have a mammogram, force the issue. 2) Buy, yes give up those few extra dollars for somekind of disability from your jobs. You'll never know when you have to be outta work. I never invested in anything, and that was/is a bad choice. Thank goodness friends on two coasts fundraised for me, but there is nothing like a pay check and over-time! These are a couple of lesson's I hope others learn from my experience.
Until next time, I"m okay. Steve is taking care of me this week; I have a head cold on top of just having chemo on the 27th. Again, I"m okay.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Second PET scan results
Hi all-
I hope all is well with each of you this Thanksgiving week. From my family to yours, have a blessed and happy holiday. Wear loose, clothing and eat well!
The results are as follows: The chemothearpy is working."No metabolic activity" in the chest, right clavial, and right axilla detected. (yes, only after 3 rounds of chemo!) The nodules in my lungs have shrunk from 7mm to 2.5mm, therefore confirming a diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer in my lungs.
Don't worry about me though! I choose to be happy, I choose to fight & win my battle against cancer, and I choose to live! Enough said....
I want to "Thank" Susan for all here wonderful work, and for the support she continues to give me. In addition, I'd like to "Thank", again, all the great people who helped support all of the various team Tiffany's. I am blessed to have such a wide based support group.
I hope all is well with each of you this Thanksgiving week. From my family to yours, have a blessed and happy holiday. Wear loose, clothing and eat well!
The results are as follows: The chemothearpy is working."No metabolic activity" in the chest, right clavial, and right axilla detected. (yes, only after 3 rounds of chemo!) The nodules in my lungs have shrunk from 7mm to 2.5mm, therefore confirming a diagnosis of metastatic breast cancer in my lungs.
Don't worry about me though! I choose to be happy, I choose to fight & win my battle against cancer, and I choose to live! Enough said....
I want to "Thank" Susan for all here wonderful work, and for the support she continues to give me. In addition, I'd like to "Thank", again, all the great people who helped support all of the various team Tiffany's. I am blessed to have such a wide based support group.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Second PET scan
Hi all-
Today was my second PET/CT scan to evaluate how well the chemotherapy is attacking the disease. We should know results within 48 hours. I will be blogging when I find out the news; so stay tuned.
Otherwise, I'm doing as well as can be expected. I'm tired and am taking frequent rest periods and naps. I am unable to exercise like before, which everybody knows I hate! My spirits are still high and I have a positive outlook on how things are going to turn out. This doesn't mean I don't have my emotional moments, but they soon pass, and I go on. I also attribute my great attitude to my supportive family and friends that I have around me! I cherish each of them.
Anyway, I'm hanging in there, fighting cancer.....
Hi all-
Today was my second PET/CT scan to evaluate how well the chemotherapy is attacking the disease. We should know results within 48 hours. I will be blogging when I find out the news; so stay tuned.
Otherwise, I'm doing as well as can be expected. I'm tired and am taking frequent rest periods and naps. I am unable to exercise like before, which everybody knows I hate! My spirits are still high and I have a positive outlook on how things are going to turn out. This doesn't mean I don't have my emotional moments, but they soon pass, and I go on. I also attribute my great attitude to my supportive family and friends that I have around me! I cherish each of them.
Anyway, I'm hanging in there, fighting cancer.....
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Thursday, Nov 8, 2007
Hi All
Hey there-
I'm doing as well as expected, for me anyway. I'm tired and I have the usual aches and pains, but nothing different from the last two rounds. I'm taking more frequent quiet moments and exercising less. As most of you know, I really hate that!
I have my emotional moments, but try to remain positive daily. Steve really helps with that. He's always encouraging me. I thank God for him daily! It's a blessing, that it's cold enough to wear this knit cap all the time. I really, really miss my hair (I know it's temporay) & vow to never again worry about bad hair days!
So, I'm doing okay throughout this treatment. Tired, hairless, but really doing okay.
Hey there-
I'm doing as well as expected, for me anyway. I'm tired and I have the usual aches and pains, but nothing different from the last two rounds. I'm taking more frequent quiet moments and exercising less. As most of you know, I really hate that!
I have my emotional moments, but try to remain positive daily. Steve really helps with that. He's always encouraging me. I thank God for him daily! It's a blessing, that it's cold enough to wear this knit cap all the time. I really, really miss my hair (I know it's temporay) & vow to never again worry about bad hair days!
So, I'm doing okay throughout this treatment. Tired, hairless, but really doing okay.
Monday, Oct 22, 2007
Amazing !
Race Day, and the support that came along with it, was amazing! Team Tiffany Virginia all showed up at 0645 (some earlier) so that we could gather for a team photo. We all wore our shirts and painted pink ribbons on our cheeks. Spectacular support is what comes to mind when I think of all those people there for me. Thank you, each of you, that came out to support a great cause.
Steve, Cas & I finished the 5k race neck & neck with a time of 29:40. The feeling of finishing a race with my men next to me, encouraging me, is greater than I can put into words. In fact, that's how I felt all day, speechless and overwhelmed.
Ocotober 20, 2007 was a great day in my life. Thank you again for your support.
Race Day, and the support that came along with it, was amazing! Team Tiffany Virginia all showed up at 0645 (some earlier) so that we could gather for a team photo. We all wore our shirts and painted pink ribbons on our cheeks. Spectacular support is what comes to mind when I think of all those people there for me. Thank you, each of you, that came out to support a great cause.
Steve, Cas & I finished the 5k race neck & neck with a time of 29:40. The feeling of finishing a race with my men next to me, encouraging me, is greater than I can put into words. In fact, that's how I felt all day, speechless and overwhelmed.
Ocotober 20, 2007 was a great day in my life. Thank you again for your support.
Wednesday, Oct 17, 2007
Race Day
Hi again!
It's only three days until the Virginia Beach RFTC, and four until Honolulu's race. I'm sorry that I can't hop on a plane & be in Honolulu on Sunday, but I'll be there in spirit.
In advance, I wanted to say "Thank You" for participating in this great cause. Our collective efforts, along with thousands of others, make me hopeful that one day soon there will be a cure for this terrible disease.
I hope that my friends in both states enjoy being a part of cancer history, take a lot of great pictures and don't get upset at how early they have to get up to exercise. I'll be expecting people to post their stories and pictures. I guarantee I'll be doing the same.
I can't thank each and every one of you enough for your continued support! TLC from TLC.
Hi again!
It's only three days until the Virginia Beach RFTC, and four until Honolulu's race. I'm sorry that I can't hop on a plane & be in Honolulu on Sunday, but I'll be there in spirit.
In advance, I wanted to say "Thank You" for participating in this great cause. Our collective efforts, along with thousands of others, make me hopeful that one day soon there will be a cure for this terrible disease.
I hope that my friends in both states enjoy being a part of cancer history, take a lot of great pictures and don't get upset at how early they have to get up to exercise. I'll be expecting people to post their stories and pictures. I guarantee I'll be doing the same.
I can't thank each and every one of you enough for your continued support! TLC from TLC.
Wednesday, Oct 17, 2007
Sorry!
Dear Family & Friends: I'm sorry for not blogging sooner in the week. I could have, but time, feeling a bit yucky and just being tired got the best of me.
Yesterday, some folks I was visiting told me "WOW, you look great. If I didn't know better, I couldn't tell you were sick." Apparently, I don't look as poorly as I feel. I guess the wig is doing its job and paying off! This is great news because I don't want people to feel sorry for the poor little cancer patient.
I do have a small list of complaints about some chemo-related physical ailments. HOWEVER... I choose to be positive and NOT complain. After all, what good would that do? I have cancer and am undergoing chemotherapy. Therefore, I am going to feel bad, be tired and not blog when I'm supposed to! I actually feel really bad for not getting to this sooner. Again, I am sorry. Each day, each afternoon, is a new challenge that I gladly accept. I am choosing not to be a "victim" of what is happening to my body and will try to remain as normal as I possibly can.
My son Cas is coming home from college this Thursday. He will be here to give me many hugs and lots of love. He will also be participating in the RFTC with us on Saturday. I'm so excited about the race, after all, I've been jogging four days a week trying to maintain strength and stamina! I'll be sure to blog and let everybody know how I did.
Dear Family & Friends: I'm sorry for not blogging sooner in the week. I could have, but time, feeling a bit yucky and just being tired got the best of me.
Yesterday, some folks I was visiting told me "WOW, you look great. If I didn't know better, I couldn't tell you were sick." Apparently, I don't look as poorly as I feel. I guess the wig is doing its job and paying off! This is great news because I don't want people to feel sorry for the poor little cancer patient.
I do have a small list of complaints about some chemo-related physical ailments. HOWEVER... I choose to be positive and NOT complain. After all, what good would that do? I have cancer and am undergoing chemotherapy. Therefore, I am going to feel bad, be tired and not blog when I'm supposed to! I actually feel really bad for not getting to this sooner. Again, I am sorry. Each day, each afternoon, is a new challenge that I gladly accept. I am choosing not to be a "victim" of what is happening to my body and will try to remain as normal as I possibly can.
My son Cas is coming home from college this Thursday. He will be here to give me many hugs and lots of love. He will also be participating in the RFTC with us on Saturday. I'm so excited about the race, after all, I've been jogging four days a week trying to maintain strength and stamina! I'll be sure to blog and let everybody know how I did.
Tuesday, Oct 9, 2007
Special Request
This may seem fairly strange to ask, but I'm learning it's necessary.
Would it be possible, for those of you that I may not know, to email me at teamtiffany@hotmail.com so that I may have your email addresses? There have been some to people sign my guestbook that I don't know how to reach. I'd like to send a personal "Thank You", but have no way of doing so. Emailing the hotmail account will still keep your email address private, yet I'll be able to write and say "Hello" or "Thank You".
On a different note, the Race for the Cure is coming up soon. I hope each of you have signed up in your different cities. Teams Tiffany in Hawaii and Virginia each have over 40 racers now. I'm thrilled that so many friends are coming out to support this event, and little 'ol me. I truly am blessed.
More updates to come after my next round of chemotherapy on Friday October 12. Stay tuned!
This may seem fairly strange to ask, but I'm learning it's necessary.
Would it be possible, for those of you that I may not know, to email me at teamtiffany@hotmail.com so that I may have your email addresses? There have been some to people sign my guestbook that I don't know how to reach. I'd like to send a personal "Thank You", but have no way of doing so. Emailing the hotmail account will still keep your email address private, yet I'll be able to write and say "Hello" or "Thank You".
On a different note, the Race for the Cure is coming up soon. I hope each of you have signed up in your different cities. Teams Tiffany in Hawaii and Virginia each have over 40 racers now. I'm thrilled that so many friends are coming out to support this event, and little 'ol me. I truly am blessed.
More updates to come after my next round of chemotherapy on Friday October 12. Stay tuned!
Monday, Oct 8,2007
Hello All!
Hi Friends & Family-
This second week post chemotherapy has been good. All the symptoms that started after receiving treatment are now gone, and I'm feeling like a relatively "normal" gal again! I'm still not really able to lift much, so my expectations are low with this one. I know I have to take baby steps, be patient, and basically start over training my body on how to tolerate using my chest muscles again.
Since that is my biggest complaint, I feel blessed with how I am doing and look forward to my next dose of chemo on October 12.
Hi Friends & Family-
This second week post chemotherapy has been good. All the symptoms that started after receiving treatment are now gone, and I'm feeling like a relatively "normal" gal again! I'm still not really able to lift much, so my expectations are low with this one. I know I have to take baby steps, be patient, and basically start over training my body on how to tolerate using my chest muscles again.
Since that is my biggest complaint, I feel blessed with how I am doing and look forward to my next dose of chemo on October 12.
Monday, Oct 1, 2007
Sorry for the freeweb site being down
Hi Friends & Family-
Freewebs is currently having some difficulties, therefore my Guestbook has been down. Once it's fixed, Susan, Pat, and Karen will have both sites up and running. Thank you for all the inquires; just keep coming back to check. You can also leaves messages for me directly on this blog page.
I'm doing okay. I get plenty of exercise, sleep and laughter daily. Steve is taking really great care of me too. My next round of chemo is Friday, November 2nd and I'm expecting to do as great as these last two rounds. I'll be blogging next week to let ya'll know. Thanks again for all the support everyone has shown.
Hi Friends & Family-
Freewebs is currently having some difficulties, therefore my Guestbook has been down. Once it's fixed, Susan, Pat, and Karen will have both sites up and running. Thank you for all the inquires; just keep coming back to check. You can also leaves messages for me directly on this blog page.
I'm doing okay. I get plenty of exercise, sleep and laughter daily. Steve is taking really great care of me too. My next round of chemo is Friday, November 2nd and I'm expecting to do as great as these last two rounds. I'll be blogging next week to let ya'll know. Thanks again for all the support everyone has shown.
Monday, Oct 1, 2007
Finally, a good doctors visit!
Hi Friends,
I'm writing to tell you that Monday's doctor's visit went well. Actually, it went very well. Today's visit was a check-up to see how I did with chemo, and to check out my lab results.
My lab values were above normal and looked great. Finally, some good news from a doctor's visit. He said the symptoms that I've been experiencing are normal and may even subside in the next few days or a week. Of course, we all know they will come back after my next chemo treatment, but if they go away for a while that would be wonderful.
So, my blood is as normal as most of ya'lls! Ha..... cancer, "BITE ME"!
Hi Friends,
I'm writing to tell you that Monday's doctor's visit went well. Actually, it went very well. Today's visit was a check-up to see how I did with chemo, and to check out my lab results.
My lab values were above normal and looked great. Finally, some good news from a doctor's visit. He said the symptoms that I've been experiencing are normal and may even subside in the next few days or a week. Of course, we all know they will come back after my next chemo treatment, but if they go away for a while that would be wonderful.
So, my blood is as normal as most of ya'lls! Ha..... cancer, "BITE ME"!
Friday, Sep 28, 2007
The Friday After
Well.. its been a week since CHEMO and I have to say that it's been interesting. I want to say that I feel okay. I'm happy that I'm finally fighting this cancer, doing something about this disease that has invaded my body and has changed my life. I want people to know that my spirits are up and I'm positive. I have my downs, too, but then I bounce back even more ready to fight.
Now for the juice: as the week progressed, I started acquiring normal symptoms from chemotherapy. Just first, I still jogged four days this week, even though I have "symptoms." My hair follicles are tingling just to let me know they can. I suppose that means I'll start losing the little bit of hair I have----SO WHAT! Tuesday I developed gum discomfort after eating an apple, so now I'm watching what I eat. Wednesday I developed joint discomfort. I thought that this was due to me jogging. However, I didn't jog Thursday but still had the discomfort into Friday. In fact, now it's joint pain and very much a symptom and not exercise related. I can feel my heart beating in part of my body and it doesn't feel good. Sometimes the pain is almost breath taking.
However, even though, regardless, nevertheless..... these are all normal symptoms. The pain is to be expected and I'm ready for it. The pain is letting me know I'm alive and fighting. I'm okay and can beat all this!
Well.. its been a week since CHEMO and I have to say that it's been interesting. I want to say that I feel okay. I'm happy that I'm finally fighting this cancer, doing something about this disease that has invaded my body and has changed my life. I want people to know that my spirits are up and I'm positive. I have my downs, too, but then I bounce back even more ready to fight.
Now for the juice: as the week progressed, I started acquiring normal symptoms from chemotherapy. Just first, I still jogged four days this week, even though I have "symptoms." My hair follicles are tingling just to let me know they can. I suppose that means I'll start losing the little bit of hair I have----SO WHAT! Tuesday I developed gum discomfort after eating an apple, so now I'm watching what I eat. Wednesday I developed joint discomfort. I thought that this was due to me jogging. However, I didn't jog Thursday but still had the discomfort into Friday. In fact, now it's joint pain and very much a symptom and not exercise related. I can feel my heart beating in part of my body and it doesn't feel good. Sometimes the pain is almost breath taking.
However, even though, regardless, nevertheless..... these are all normal symptoms. The pain is to be expected and I'm ready for it. The pain is letting me know I'm alive and fighting. I'm okay and can beat all this!
Wednesday, Sep 26, 2007
Wednesday
Hi All-
Not much to say other than I am doing okay and am symptom free from chemotherapy still. I'm sure that I'm on the other side of that; whatever "that" may be.
My days are simple, because the nights are such struggle. I can't get comfortable. Therefore, I really don't sleep, especially well (other than when I'm taking chemo drugs, that is!). These last two days my biggest goal was to get back on my treadmill and go. In two days I went 2.5 miles in under 30 minutes. Since jogging and eating are my "passions," I feel a huge sense of accomplishment getting to my goal. Then the day takes on a much simpler look. However, I won't get into how bland it really gets.
I'm on a road that is leading me to recovery and I need to learn to be patient. Thank you EVERYONE, for the phone calls, emails and letters of support I'm still getting.
Hi All-
Not much to say other than I am doing okay and am symptom free from chemotherapy still. I'm sure that I'm on the other side of that; whatever "that" may be.
My days are simple, because the nights are such struggle. I can't get comfortable. Therefore, I really don't sleep, especially well (other than when I'm taking chemo drugs, that is!). These last two days my biggest goal was to get back on my treadmill and go. In two days I went 2.5 miles in under 30 minutes. Since jogging and eating are my "passions," I feel a huge sense of accomplishment getting to my goal. Then the day takes on a much simpler look. However, I won't get into how bland it really gets.
I'm on a road that is leading me to recovery and I need to learn to be patient. Thank you EVERYONE, for the phone calls, emails and letters of support I'm still getting.
Monday, Sep 24, 2007
Made it through
Dear Friends & Family~
I MADE IT! With being exhausted as my only side effect. Steve kept checking on me to see if I was breathing. I had no negative side effects, however my mind feels a bit foggy still. Not sure if that's from my blond hair wanting to grow out, or if it's the medications, but I'll take sleep and forgetting over anything else!
I still can't believe I made it through with such a positive outcome! Maybe mind over determination is going to be the key. Not once was mortality something on my mind, nor will it be. I knew I'd be weak going into chemo if I didn't start to exercise again, and so I was back up jogging 3.5 miles before my mediport placement. I knew I'd lose my hair, so I shaved it. I knew I was going to be sick, so I ate like a horse the morning of chemo! Every day, after I shed a few/a lot of tears, I knew I was going to be okay and then faced the day.
Now that I feel good, I'm ready to hit the ground running again. I'm thinking of going back to work. Don't know what the doctors will say, but asking is worth the try. Steve went back to work today, because he didn't need to be here to watch me sleep anymore. Poor guy, kept checking on me every other hour, bringing me juice and chocolate, wanting to know if I was okay.
Sorry, to have missed so many phone calls this weekend. I'll return some asap. Also, I'll be in touch via emails; some are long over due. Thanks to each of you for your support and encouraging words. My Guestbook and the cards around my house are read daily and are the motivation that keep me going. Truly. I can't say "Thank You" enough.....Tiffany
Dear Friends & Family~
I MADE IT! With being exhausted as my only side effect. Steve kept checking on me to see if I was breathing. I had no negative side effects, however my mind feels a bit foggy still. Not sure if that's from my blond hair wanting to grow out, or if it's the medications, but I'll take sleep and forgetting over anything else!
I still can't believe I made it through with such a positive outcome! Maybe mind over determination is going to be the key. Not once was mortality something on my mind, nor will it be. I knew I'd be weak going into chemo if I didn't start to exercise again, and so I was back up jogging 3.5 miles before my mediport placement. I knew I'd lose my hair, so I shaved it. I knew I was going to be sick, so I ate like a horse the morning of chemo! Every day, after I shed a few/a lot of tears, I knew I was going to be okay and then faced the day.
Now that I feel good, I'm ready to hit the ground running again. I'm thinking of going back to work. Don't know what the doctors will say, but asking is worth the try. Steve went back to work today, because he didn't need to be here to watch me sleep anymore. Poor guy, kept checking on me every other hour, bringing me juice and chocolate, wanting to know if I was okay.
Sorry, to have missed so many phone calls this weekend. I'll return some asap. Also, I'll be in touch via emails; some are long over due. Thanks to each of you for your support and encouraging words. My Guestbook and the cards around my house are read daily and are the motivation that keep me going. Truly. I can't say "Thank You" enough.....Tiffany
Saturday, Sep 22, 2007
Day After First Chemotherapy Treatment
I'd like to admit that I was nervous going into the whole day. I'd met with Plastics before, but this would be my last time until after chemo was done. I'd met with Oncology before, but..... he gave us more news that my mamillary nodes had postive metabolic activity going on, as well as in all the other areas in my neck and lungs. Our game plan doesn't change, though, so off to infusion I go!
The mediport still was very sensitive from Wednesday's placement. So when the nurse grabbed it to use it, the site was sore. BUT, the port works and that's all that matters! 1130-1400 is how long the actual chemotherapy infusion went.
I had lunch, watched a Rachel Ray Hour and the View. Two different visitors came by and Steve was there the entire time. Of course, he was doing work business from his cell phone that pulled him away a few times, but he was with me, like he has been the whole time.
I feel so lucky to have my torpedoman chief become my new nurse Rachett. Today he gave me a shot of Neulasta in the butt without even blinking (it's to promote WBC's). Also, he remembers everything that all the doctors and ancillary staff say, so when I forget, he's got my back. I also feel so blessed for those of you who have written in my Guestbook, as well as sent emails. OH YEAH, and all the people supporting Team Tiffany, in all the states! Amazing.
Thank you for being my friends and for being there for me....Tiffany
I'd like to admit that I was nervous going into the whole day. I'd met with Plastics before, but this would be my last time until after chemo was done. I'd met with Oncology before, but..... he gave us more news that my mamillary nodes had postive metabolic activity going on, as well as in all the other areas in my neck and lungs. Our game plan doesn't change, though, so off to infusion I go!
The mediport still was very sensitive from Wednesday's placement. So when the nurse grabbed it to use it, the site was sore. BUT, the port works and that's all that matters! 1130-1400 is how long the actual chemotherapy infusion went.
I had lunch, watched a Rachel Ray Hour and the View. Two different visitors came by and Steve was there the entire time. Of course, he was doing work business from his cell phone that pulled him away a few times, but he was with me, like he has been the whole time.
I feel so lucky to have my torpedoman chief become my new nurse Rachett. Today he gave me a shot of Neulasta in the butt without even blinking (it's to promote WBC's). Also, he remembers everything that all the doctors and ancillary staff say, so when I forget, he's got my back. I also feel so blessed for those of you who have written in my Guestbook, as well as sent emails. OH YEAH, and all the people supporting Team Tiffany, in all the states! Amazing.
Thank you for being my friends and for being there for me....Tiffany
Wednesday, Sep 19, 2007
Update
Hi Folks,
What a busy week so far! We're good, I'm good.
Monday's tissue expander fill up went well. Tuesday was a long day, because it consisted mostly of paperwork. The chemo teaching went good; I got a great cook book, and a good "how to eat healthy during chemo" magazine. Today's mediport placement went well. I'm a bit sore tonight & am having some discomfort turning my head but.... duh, I had them tunneling through my tissue today!
Hope this informs you all on how I'm doing. They told me I couldn't jog tomorrow. Friday, I get chemo, so I may not be able to then either, huge bummer! But, that's the only thing I "can't" do for a little bit. Steve is taking great care of me; Baby is giving me all the love a little dog can! I'm blessed...... Yes, I feel like I've been given a blessing in disguise!
Thanks for all the support. The words of encouragment have been such a huge help. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Hi Folks,
What a busy week so far! We're good, I'm good.
Monday's tissue expander fill up went well. Tuesday was a long day, because it consisted mostly of paperwork. The chemo teaching went good; I got a great cook book, and a good "how to eat healthy during chemo" magazine. Today's mediport placement went well. I'm a bit sore tonight & am having some discomfort turning my head but.... duh, I had them tunneling through my tissue today!
Hope this informs you all on how I'm doing. They told me I couldn't jog tomorrow. Friday, I get chemo, so I may not be able to then either, huge bummer! But, that's the only thing I "can't" do for a little bit. Steve is taking great care of me; Baby is giving me all the love a little dog can! I'm blessed...... Yes, I feel like I've been given a blessing in disguise!
Thanks for all the support. The words of encouragment have been such a huge help. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Friday, Sep 14, 2007
Feeling Good !
Hi Friends - I'm sorry to have missed so many phone calls last night and today. Even though I am doing okay, and staying positive, and living life as normal as I can, I'm just not up to the same phone call 93 times.
Steve & I got up to run this am; a 5k in practice for the 20th of October. Then, later in the morning I had THE BEST massage from Stacey. I plan on visiting her at least once a month. I met with my "barber" to discuss my upcoming haircut. This will take place 9/18/07 in the evening. I'm going really, really short so that I'm not traumatized when clumps of my long hair start to fall out. I always told Gerber to just shave my whole head if that was ever me. Fortunately, I'll get my buzz cut soon enough.... so tell Gerber I won't be lopsided!
I'm fine ya'll. Staying positive, and getting stronger. Steve & I both know I'm going to be fine. Most of you know how stubborn I can be, without even trying...... I'm trying to be impossible against this cancer. I am fine, please don't worry too much. However, I love each one of you for caring & fighting with me!
Next week's appointments go as follows: 9-17 I see Plastics for my last fill up in my tissue expanders until all treatment is done. 9-18 I fill out paperwork for Same Day Surgery, and I have Chemo teaching. 9-19 I go to Interventional Radiology for mediport placement (a mediport is where I'll get my chemo injected & if I have to have lab work, this is where they will draw blood from). 9-21 I start Chemo.......
I'm fab..... hope ya'll are too....Tiffany
Hi Friends - I'm sorry to have missed so many phone calls last night and today. Even though I am doing okay, and staying positive, and living life as normal as I can, I'm just not up to the same phone call 93 times.
Steve & I got up to run this am; a 5k in practice for the 20th of October. Then, later in the morning I had THE BEST massage from Stacey. I plan on visiting her at least once a month. I met with my "barber" to discuss my upcoming haircut. This will take place 9/18/07 in the evening. I'm going really, really short so that I'm not traumatized when clumps of my long hair start to fall out. I always told Gerber to just shave my whole head if that was ever me. Fortunately, I'll get my buzz cut soon enough.... so tell Gerber I won't be lopsided!
I'm fine ya'll. Staying positive, and getting stronger. Steve & I both know I'm going to be fine. Most of you know how stubborn I can be, without even trying...... I'm trying to be impossible against this cancer. I am fine, please don't worry too much. However, I love each one of you for caring & fighting with me!
Next week's appointments go as follows: 9-17 I see Plastics for my last fill up in my tissue expanders until all treatment is done. 9-18 I fill out paperwork for Same Day Surgery, and I have Chemo teaching. 9-19 I go to Interventional Radiology for mediport placement (a mediport is where I'll get my chemo injected & if I have to have lab work, this is where they will draw blood from). 9-21 I start Chemo.......
I'm fab..... hope ya'll are too....Tiffany
Thursday, Sep 13, 2007
20% & 0%
The Oncology visit went as follows: I have several lymph nodes in my right supra-clavical area that are positive for cancer. The largest being 1.3cm. Doc gives me a 20% cure rate with chemo.
In addition, I have multiple nodules in both my left & right lungs, measuring 4-8mm. Because of these sizes, we are not able to biopsy, but the Radiologist & Oncologist believe that this is metastatic breast cancer. If this is metz of the lungs, I have a 0% chance of being cured.
There are probably a lot more details that I could input here, but for now this kind of says it all. Tiff
The Oncology visit went as follows: I have several lymph nodes in my right supra-clavical area that are positive for cancer. The largest being 1.3cm. Doc gives me a 20% cure rate with chemo.
In addition, I have multiple nodules in both my left & right lungs, measuring 4-8mm. Because of these sizes, we are not able to biopsy, but the Radiologist & Oncologist believe that this is metastatic breast cancer. If this is metz of the lungs, I have a 0% chance of being cured.
There are probably a lot more details that I could input here, but for now this kind of says it all. Tiff
Tuesday, Sep 11, 2007
PET Scan
What should I say about this appointment? It was painless. The people were friendly and comforting. However, once my IV was started I had to wait 75 minutes before I could be scanned. They put me a comfy chair, gave me one of those warm blankets, & turned down the lights to a dim. Sounds good right. For 60 minutes my mind wandered over the last few months and how each scenario has played out. I remember most things (I'd like to think everything, but.....) all the details of each visit, the words that were said, all the things Steve & I have talked about. I still can't believe this is happening to me. ME.....So for 60 minutes I felt pretty sorry for myself; one of those low points on the roller coaster that I talk about so frequently.
We should have the results by our next appointment on September 13, 2007.
What should I say about this appointment? It was painless. The people were friendly and comforting. However, once my IV was started I had to wait 75 minutes before I could be scanned. They put me a comfy chair, gave me one of those warm blankets, & turned down the lights to a dim. Sounds good right. For 60 minutes my mind wandered over the last few months and how each scenario has played out. I remember most things (I'd like to think everything, but.....) all the details of each visit, the words that were said, all the things Steve & I have talked about. I still can't believe this is happening to me. ME.....So for 60 minutes I felt pretty sorry for myself; one of those low points on the roller coaster that I talk about so frequently.
We should have the results by our next appointment on September 13, 2007.
Monday, Sep 10, 2007
Radiation Oncology Consult
Hey- Today we met with Radiation Oncology. In a nut shell: this doctor wants to be very aggressive. He plans on radiating me from mid-sternum (to include a bit of the left lung) to right clavicle, to right axilla, to just above my belly button area. A very large area to say the least.
Still, Steve & I can't wrap our minds around why, since they did the mastectomy, and will do the chemotherapy before the radiation. Doesn't the chemo kill enough of the microscopic organisms that can't be detected? Isn't radiation a bit of over kill? We read the stats, and the literature, but it is still not something we can accept for me/us. Needless to say, this business wont happen until January.
So, I"m loving the website(s)! I"m loving the attention all ya'll are giving me! I'm loving the wonderful things people have to say in the guestbooks; the support & encouragment is tremendous! I get cards and emails daily, and it feels soooooooooooo good! My CEO's of Team Tiffany: Susan, Karen, Gregg and hubby Steve are doing a fabulous job! It's great just to have you all being there in spirit for me! More to come soon.....Tiffany
Hey- Today we met with Radiation Oncology. In a nut shell: this doctor wants to be very aggressive. He plans on radiating me from mid-sternum (to include a bit of the left lung) to right clavicle, to right axilla, to just above my belly button area. A very large area to say the least.
Still, Steve & I can't wrap our minds around why, since they did the mastectomy, and will do the chemotherapy before the radiation. Doesn't the chemo kill enough of the microscopic organisms that can't be detected? Isn't radiation a bit of over kill? We read the stats, and the literature, but it is still not something we can accept for me/us. Needless to say, this business wont happen until January.
So, I"m loving the website(s)! I"m loving the attention all ya'll are giving me! I'm loving the wonderful things people have to say in the guestbooks; the support & encouragment is tremendous! I get cards and emails daily, and it feels soooooooooooo good! My CEO's of Team Tiffany: Susan, Karen, Gregg and hubby Steve are doing a fabulous job! It's great just to have you all being there in spirit for me! More to come soon.....Tiffany
Saturday, Sep 8, 2007
Two Good Appointments
Hi All-
Yesterday, Friday the 7th, I had an Echocardiogram. I was in and out in 20 minutes. Great experience, zero pain/discomfort. Then, I got to go up and see Dr.Hersh (my Plastics doc) and he gave me a filler up in both expanders. I was anticipating lots of pain. NOT.....just a smidge/tiny/tiny bit. He added 60cc to both sides; which expands me now to 260cc in both sides. Today I'm having a bit of chest pressure, but it's to be expected.
Doc cleared me to exercise/jog again. He made reference to how healthy Lance Armstrong was (he shoulda died he was soooooooo sick), so he said go for it. However, my over protective husband, said "no" to running, and only allowed me to speed walk. Said I'd burn the same calories." Either way it felt good to get out there and sweat. I'll jog when he goes back to work
Thank you for all the wonderful entries all of you have made. You might not know this, but every morning and every evening before bed, I re-read every word that all of you have written. There is this card a very special fella gave me also, that I read twice a day. These items are my daily pep talk. I thank each one of you!
Talk to you soon. Appointments on the 10th, 11th, and 13th so I'll write again soon. ~Tiffany~
Hi All-
Yesterday, Friday the 7th, I had an Echocardiogram. I was in and out in 20 minutes. Great experience, zero pain/discomfort. Then, I got to go up and see Dr.Hersh (my Plastics doc) and he gave me a filler up in both expanders. I was anticipating lots of pain. NOT.....just a smidge/tiny/tiny bit. He added 60cc to both sides; which expands me now to 260cc in both sides. Today I'm having a bit of chest pressure, but it's to be expected.
Doc cleared me to exercise/jog again. He made reference to how healthy Lance Armstrong was (he shoulda died he was soooooooo sick), so he said go for it. However, my over protective husband, said "no" to running, and only allowed me to speed walk. Said I'd burn the same calories." Either way it felt good to get out there and sweat. I'll jog when he goes back to work
Thank you for all the wonderful entries all of you have made. You might not know this, but every morning and every evening before bed, I re-read every word that all of you have written. There is this card a very special fella gave me also, that I read twice a day. These items are my daily pep talk. I thank each one of you!
Talk to you soon. Appointments on the 10th, 11th, and 13th so I'll write again soon. ~Tiffany~
Wednesday, Sep 5, 2007
It's been a few days, so I'm writing with nothing really much to say. I've driven a couple of times, but choose not to because the use of the pec muscles for the small things bring me discomfort. (like turning and looking over your shoulder).
I have appointments September 6, 7, 10, 11, 13th so there will be lots of news to share soon. My bruises from the fall look ugly still, but are healing. Hopefully, my Plastic's doctor will still give me a "filler up" with bruising. I"m looking forward to a bit of cleavage!
I will write as each appointment comes to let you all know whats going on. ~Tiffany~
I have appointments September 6, 7, 10, 11, 13th so there will be lots of news to share soon. My bruises from the fall look ugly still, but are healing. Hopefully, my Plastic's doctor will still give me a "filler up" with bruising. I"m looking forward to a bit of cleavage!
I will write as each appointment comes to let you all know whats going on. ~Tiffany~
Monday, Sep 3, 2007
To Susan T.
Susan, you heard about my cancer and you responded like no other! I appreciate what you've said, and all the things you're doing & making happen. You've created a monster, because of me, and I am thankful. You know the rest of the sappy way I feel, so ..... keep up the good work!
Susan, you heard about my cancer and you responded like no other! I appreciate what you've said, and all the things you're doing & making happen. You've created a monster, because of me, and I am thankful. You know the rest of the sappy way I feel, so ..... keep up the good work!
Monday, Sep 3, 2007
Slowing down a bit
The last few days, I've sped walked or jogged in some fashion. This a.m. I got up to walk/jog with Steve & our great friend Jeff, with as much gusto as I would have on any day. However, I think I'm doing too much; but it feels so good to try & succeed. Exercising, sweating, and feeling the sunshine feels great. Doesn't everybody tell me to do things that make me feel good & that are positive?
I dunno..... I guess I have to learn to do something else.
The last few days, I've sped walked or jogged in some fashion. This a.m. I got up to walk/jog with Steve & our great friend Jeff, with as much gusto as I would have on any day. However, I think I'm doing too much; but it feels so good to try & succeed. Exercising, sweating, and feeling the sunshine feels great. Doesn't everybody tell me to do things that make me feel good & that are positive?
I dunno..... I guess I have to learn to do something else.
Saturday, Sep 1, 2007
Good Day, All Around
I walked/slowly jogged this am. I drove myself to various stores. I bought new high heels (like I'm gonna need to wear'em anytime soon) & a few new tops. Then my Georgia Bulldawgs (that's how we spell dog in the south) kicked butt during the first game of the season. Off to bed......Good day & no melt downs uncle Mickey!
I walked/slowly jogged this am. I drove myself to various stores. I bought new high heels (like I'm gonna need to wear'em anytime soon) & a few new tops. Then my Georgia Bulldawgs (that's how we spell dog in the south) kicked butt during the first game of the season. Off to bed......Good day & no melt downs uncle Mickey!
Friday, Aug 31, 2007
Virginia Komen Race October 20
Can't sleep, so I was looking for Virginia's race dates, "officially". More information to follow, but as of this second : 10/20/07 at 0645 Team Tiffany will be down at the Neptune Park on 31st Park (next to the Hilton) for our race. Check out the new tab, RFTC Virginia.
I've got many supporters here in VA, so hopefully ya'll will stand tall with me on Saturday October 20.
Can't sleep, so I was looking for Virginia's race dates, "officially". More information to follow, but as of this second : 10/20/07 at 0645 Team Tiffany will be down at the Neptune Park on 31st Park (next to the Hilton) for our race. Check out the new tab, RFTC Virginia.
I've got many supporters here in VA, so hopefully ya'll will stand tall with me on Saturday October 20.
Friday, Aug 31, 2007
Two Weeks Post-Op Today!
I walked a mile or so, felt the sunshine on my body, went to Dr. Bonnie Rose's feel good store, saw some co-workers, went to a BBQ with my USS Tucson family, and grocery shopped. After a long nap, Steve and I watched a funny movie. Today, there were no tears or accidents of any kind. Today, was a good day!
I walked a mile or so, felt the sunshine on my body, went to Dr. Bonnie Rose's feel good store, saw some co-workers, went to a BBQ with my USS Tucson family, and grocery shopped. After a long nap, Steve and I watched a funny movie. Today, there were no tears or accidents of any kind. Today, was a good day!
Thursday, Aug 30, 2007
Interesting Day
Baby & I started our day with a .4-mile walk in the warm sunshine. It felt super good to get out. Being sweaty with steri-strips felt a bit weird, but I was happy to be out. Then I took a light weighted broom and did my post op arm exercises, along with some squats & lunges. To top off our morning, Baby & I sat in the sun, drinking sweet tea. Today felt so good.
Shower time! I was getting prepared and remembered one last thing from downstairs. To make this long story shorter, I fell down four stairs. My right arm (the one with the axillary dissection) went straight out (I guess to catch myself) and it bent behind me. I won't say how long I cried, or get into how hysterical I got, but I did.
I called the doctor while Steve was rushing home from work. Then he was able to put me to bed with a double dose of drugs, & a heating pad.
Hours later now, I feel a bit better, but like I've been knocked on my ass. I also feel like the wind was knocked outta my sails.
Tomorrow, I'm getting up earlier, and walking further. Today, is not gonna keep me down.
Baby & I started our day with a .4-mile walk in the warm sunshine. It felt super good to get out. Being sweaty with steri-strips felt a bit weird, but I was happy to be out. Then I took a light weighted broom and did my post op arm exercises, along with some squats & lunges. To top off our morning, Baby & I sat in the sun, drinking sweet tea. Today felt so good.
Shower time! I was getting prepared and remembered one last thing from downstairs. To make this long story shorter, I fell down four stairs. My right arm (the one with the axillary dissection) went straight out (I guess to catch myself) and it bent behind me. I won't say how long I cried, or get into how hysterical I got, but I did.
I called the doctor while Steve was rushing home from work. Then he was able to put me to bed with a double dose of drugs, & a heating pad.
Hours later now, I feel a bit better, but like I've been knocked on my ass. I also feel like the wind was knocked outta my sails.
Tomorrow, I'm getting up earlier, and walking further. Today, is not gonna keep me down.
Tuesday, Aug 28, 2007
Steve had a great idea that I help in the yard today. He gave me a pair of cute gloves, and some tiny scissors to trim edges on the bushes that had over grown. Small job- no problem. I even positioned myself in the sun, so that I might actually turn this pale blue into something else.
Once I got movitated, I moved onto small weeds that were in the flower bed. That's when I had a melt down. One weed was stronger than me. I was pretty upset. Steve hugged me, and told me it's only been a few days; then he told me to go pet Baby (the dog for those of you who don't know). This made me feel better, as well as his words ringing in my ears, "it's only been a few days".
So much for helping in the yard, and most importantly, working on my tan!
Once I got movitated, I moved onto small weeds that were in the flower bed. That's when I had a melt down. One weed was stronger than me. I was pretty upset. Steve hugged me, and told me it's only been a few days; then he told me to go pet Baby (the dog for those of you who don't know). This made me feel better, as well as his words ringing in my ears, "it's only been a few days".
So much for helping in the yard, and most importantly, working on my tan!
Friday, Aug 24, 2007
Today, my three drains came out. This wasn't a painful process, as imagined it
would be. I feel so much better. I still have some chest pressure,
but nothing like before; I also got a new prescription for valium
today- which helps with pressure. I FEEL GREAT! I even took a shower
and got dressed all by myself for the first time!
Today, my pathology report came out. Not the greatest news: I have cancer....
DUH! I have cancer in my lymph nodes, in addition to having it in my
former breast tissue. 5 nodes out of 13 nodes are positive for
tumor. My Nottingham Histologic Grade is 9/9..... the scale goes
from 1-9, so it's bad.
With all that being said, and now that it's had time to sink in.... I'm a bit
bummed. I can't help but think "How much worse can this get".
However, I stil don't feel like I'm "sick". Sure, I just had major
surgery, and I'm not on my 'A' game from that, but all this would be
easier to believe if I was "sick" in some way. I'm just eager to
feel better so that I can resume life as it was.
I'm not worried about cancer. This is just something I have to do and then
go on......back to normal.
would be. I feel so much better. I still have some chest pressure,
but nothing like before; I also got a new prescription for valium
today- which helps with pressure. I FEEL GREAT! I even took a shower
and got dressed all by myself for the first time!
Today, my pathology report came out. Not the greatest news: I have cancer....
DUH! I have cancer in my lymph nodes, in addition to having it in my
former breast tissue. 5 nodes out of 13 nodes are positive for
tumor. My Nottingham Histologic Grade is 9/9..... the scale goes
from 1-9, so it's bad.
With all that being said, and now that it's had time to sink in.... I'm a bit
bummed. I can't help but think "How much worse can this get".
However, I stil don't feel like I'm "sick". Sure, I just had major
surgery, and I'm not on my 'A' game from that, but all this would be
easier to believe if I was "sick" in some way. I'm just eager to
feel better so that I can resume life as it was.
I'm not worried about cancer. This is just something I have to do and then
go on......back to normal.
Thursday, Aug 23, 2007
Dear Friends & Family-
Thank you for the support and encouragement each one of you have
been sending me. As I move through the phases of cancer recovery, I
draw strength from each of you. Keep up the good work.
July 16th was the day I was diagnosed with Invasive Ductal
Carcinoma. It was in two quadrants of the right breast, mulicentric.
This meant I HAD to have a mastectomy. ME.... I had no choice. Now,
most of you know how I like to be in control of EVERYTHING! Which
now, looking back, probably made my choice of whether or not to do
bilateral breasts harder, because I could control that decision.
It took me four weeks, until the week of surgery to decide that I
was going to do bilateral breasts. I have such a overwhelming family
history of breast cancer, that I knew bilateral was the best choice
for me. However, I should express that this was an extremely hard
decision to make, the kind that kept you sleepless and not paying
attention when one should.
My surgery was Friday, August 17 2007. I got to the hospital at
0600, went to nuclear medicine at 0800. They keep saying it's
because I'm in such good shape that the radiographic dye went to its
supposed site (the bad lymph nodes) immediately. The rad techs tell
me the dye imaging process could take up to three hours, or longer.
I was in and out in 50 minutes. This meant I had to wait, and wait,
and wait, and wait until the OR was ready for me. This was a trying
time, because I was ready- I was there- I was emotionally prepared
to do this and then get better. My husband, my mother, my friends
Gina and Mike waited so calmly; God bless 'em (that's all I'm gonna
say about that!)
I went in & I came out. What else is there to say. Out and in a
room late Friday night. Don't remember much, except I had LOTS of
chest pressure and I was super hot. I experienced a lot of nausea
before I eventually felt better. Saturday afternoon was when my
friend Gina and mom, MADE me get up and sit and eventually, walk. I
was mad, but got over it. By Saturday night I was wiping down the
counters, and dusting my room. I got home from the hospital at
9:30pm Saturday, August 18, 2007.
I can't get down into bed by myself, still. Nor can I put on the
camisole that I wear to hold my drains and dressings. Other than
that, I can do for myself, although Steve tends to all my
everything. My torpedoman who doesn't care for anything hospital
related (he thinks it's all disgusting) has been a super caregiver,
and a wonderful patient advocate.
Now, I sleep a lot. Take my medicine every six hours, and track my
drain output every eight hours. Now that I'm under 30cc in a 24-hour
period (drainage), it's only a matter of time. Friday, the 24th, I
have an appointment for drain removal; I'm expecting all three to
come out.
Thank you for all the cards and flowers, and edible arrangements!
I've strategically placed the flowers around the house, so that when
I enter a new room, I see & smell them. I'm okay.... I"m healing,
and getting better every day.
Thank you for the support and encouragement each one of you have
been sending me. As I move through the phases of cancer recovery, I
draw strength from each of you. Keep up the good work.
July 16th was the day I was diagnosed with Invasive Ductal
Carcinoma. It was in two quadrants of the right breast, mulicentric.
This meant I HAD to have a mastectomy. ME.... I had no choice. Now,
most of you know how I like to be in control of EVERYTHING! Which
now, looking back, probably made my choice of whether or not to do
bilateral breasts harder, because I could control that decision.
It took me four weeks, until the week of surgery to decide that I
was going to do bilateral breasts. I have such a overwhelming family
history of breast cancer, that I knew bilateral was the best choice
for me. However, I should express that this was an extremely hard
decision to make, the kind that kept you sleepless and not paying
attention when one should.
My surgery was Friday, August 17 2007. I got to the hospital at
0600, went to nuclear medicine at 0800. They keep saying it's
because I'm in such good shape that the radiographic dye went to its
supposed site (the bad lymph nodes) immediately. The rad techs tell
me the dye imaging process could take up to three hours, or longer.
I was in and out in 50 minutes. This meant I had to wait, and wait,
and wait, and wait until the OR was ready for me. This was a trying
time, because I was ready- I was there- I was emotionally prepared
to do this and then get better. My husband, my mother, my friends
Gina and Mike waited so calmly; God bless 'em (that's all I'm gonna
say about that!)
I went in & I came out. What else is there to say. Out and in a
room late Friday night. Don't remember much, except I had LOTS of
chest pressure and I was super hot. I experienced a lot of nausea
before I eventually felt better. Saturday afternoon was when my
friend Gina and mom, MADE me get up and sit and eventually, walk. I
was mad, but got over it. By Saturday night I was wiping down the
counters, and dusting my room. I got home from the hospital at
9:30pm Saturday, August 18, 2007.
I can't get down into bed by myself, still. Nor can I put on the
camisole that I wear to hold my drains and dressings. Other than
that, I can do for myself, although Steve tends to all my
everything. My torpedoman who doesn't care for anything hospital
related (he thinks it's all disgusting) has been a super caregiver,
and a wonderful patient advocate.
Now, I sleep a lot. Take my medicine every six hours, and track my
drain output every eight hours. Now that I'm under 30cc in a 24-hour
period (drainage), it's only a matter of time. Friday, the 24th, I
have an appointment for drain removal; I'm expecting all three to
come out.
Thank you for all the cards and flowers, and edible arrangements!
I've strategically placed the flowers around the house, so that when
I enter a new room, I see & smell them. I'm okay.... I"m healing,
and getting better every day.
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